A plea for Eros

Contentment in love usually goes unquestioned. Still, i don't think enduring love is rational any more than momentary flings. I have been married to the same man for fifteen years, and i can't explainwhy he still attracts me as an erotic object. He does, but why? Shouldn't it all be worn out by now? It is not because we are so close or know each other so well. That solidifies our frienship, not our attraction. The attraction remains because there's something about him that i can't reach, something strange and estranging. I like seeing from a distance. I know that. I like to see him in a room full of people when he looks like a stranger, and then to remember that i do know him and that i will be goig home with him. But why he sometimes strikes me as a magical being, a person unlike others, i can't tell you. He has many good features, but so do other men who leave me cold has a stone. Have i given him this quality because it is efficient for me, or is it actually him, some piece of him that i will never conquer and never know? It must be both. It must be between us - an enchanted space that wholly unreasonable and, at least in part, imaginary. There is still a fence for me to cross and, on the other side of it, a secret.

Siri Hustved (1996)
Com a devida vénia à Poppy que me facultou estas pérolas.